National Body Language Day: small nonverbal habits that help

Tomorrow is National Body Language Day, which National Day Calendar describes as a day to notice the silent messages people send without realizing it. Most conversations carry a lot of meaning beyond the words, whether you are talking with a coworker, a partner or a teenager at the dinner table.

The American Association for the Advancement of Science has a communication guide with practical advice that works well outside of formal settings too. It suggests an open, alert posture with your shoulders back but not tense, and turning your body toward the person you are talking with. It recommends avoiding fidgeting, like tapping a foot or bouncing a leg, since those signals can read as impatience.

Eye contact matters. The guide notes that steady eye contact shows you are engaged, and looking away while someone asks you a question can come across as avoiding the issue. A warm facial expression, including a smile when it fits, helps people feel at ease. Relaxed, purposeful hand gestures can also help listeners follow what you mean, and the guide notes that gesturing can help your own thinking.

Tone and pace count as well. Speaking at a moderate pace, without rushing or dragging, and avoiding a flat monotone make it easier for people to stay with you.

In your next conversation tonight, try putting your phone face down and turning toward the person who is talking. It is the simplest signal that you are listening.